Random Quotes

[CORPORAL]

Chappelle Show (Look what this thread has done to me lol)

Mace "Sam Jackson" Windau: "I'd just like to say that this council will have 0 tolerance for any sexual deviancy reagarding our Jedi Knights!"
Woman Reporter: "Mace do you fell that the Jedi who have commited these kind of crimes deserve to die."
Mace "Sam Jackson" Windau: "Yes they deserve to die and I hope they burn in hell!!"

Time Hater: "Mark ass marks, trick ass marks, bunk bitches and skip scop skanks and scaliwags. Hos, heffers hee-haws and hoolihoos!"

Black Bush: "I got a Coalition of the Willing I got forty nations ready to roll son!"
Reporter: "Like who?"
Black Bush: "Who the **** said that! Like who? England. Japan's sending Playstations. Stankonia said they are willing to drop bombs over Baghdad. Rickidy Raw is coming. Africa Bambaata and the Zulu Nation."

[CHRIST]

"Hey hey hey hey. Smoke weed every day."

"Pink Hearts, Yellow Moons, Green Clovers, and Orange Stars - that leprechauns' on acid!"

"Cocaine is a helluva drug."

"Tell your little friends, that dreams really do come true. Dave Chappelle came and saw you in the hospital and whooped your monkey ass at some 'Street Hoops'!"
"Dave, can't you see I'm dying of cancer?"
"Billy, I'm sorry man. I was just trying to teach you a lesson! You can beat cancer but you got to be strong. I see it in you Billy, you're going to make it."
"Really?"
"Hell, no, nigga! You play like a bitch! Hang on a second."

"Darkness! Come closer, I wanna see more than just eyes and teeth!"

"What? Huh? Oil? Who said somethin' bout oil, bitch. You cookin? Oil? Man, I don't know what...
[knocks over water pitcher]
Come on, y'all! Get out of here!"

[Cancer]

Well I got a few.
I'm gonna have to steal one that's already been posted 'caues it's my favorite.

Space Balls
"Evil will always triumph because good is dumb."

Monty Python's Holy Grail
"Wait, there's something we haven't tried. Go get... The Holy Hand Grenade!"

"Only those who pass a test will pass through this forest."
"What's the test?"
"The test is, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the land with,... a herring!"

Airplane!
*on an airplane*
"Nervous?"
"Huh? Oh, yes."
"First time?"
"No, I've been nervous lots of times."

"Baby, I'm flying out tomorrow on a bombing run. We're coming in from the north, below the radar."
"Oh Stan, when will you be back?"
"I can't tell you that, it's classified."

I can't think of any more right now.